When uncomfortable feelings creep in.
Sometimes we get stuck. Stuck in an unrewarding career or unfulfilling relationships. Stuck in an emotional rut. Our minds can race thinking of all the things going wrong in our life, but solutions are elusive. Sometimes it feels like we are burnt out. Only going through the motions of life. There is just nothing left in the tank; nothing left to give to ourselves and nothing left to give to our loved ones. Our glass isn’t just half empty, it broke while unloading the dishwasher. Sometimes it feels like we are in a funk. The funk of the same stuff, but a different day. It’s “Groundhog Day”, but Bill Murray is nowhere to be seen. And all the things we try are, at best, only temporary fixes.
Getting stuck, burnt out or in a funk can sometimes start in very subtle ways; we may find we are feeling bored, restless, unappreciated, lost or confused about an area (or areas) of our life. But over time it can build up and morph into a significant problem. Constantly looming over us and stressing us out. It can create panic and anxiety. If left unchecked that feeling of being stuck can tumble downhill into sadness as we begin to feel less hopeful. Falling further, we can get paralyzed in depression.
Getting stuck happens.
Most people experience feeling stuck at some point in their lifetime. It is all part of emotional growth. Something was working and now it’s not. There has to be a change or that stuck feeling remains. If it does remain, it can have the potential for heading down that slippery slope of depression.
Many of the clients I see come in because they are feeling stuck. They are stuck experiencing emotions that do not feel good, stuck with a bunch of thoughts that make them feel worse, stuck making poor decisions or choices and stuck engaging in destructive behaviors. It’s an exhausting cycle.
Most people. My clients. And me.
Looking back on my life, I can clearly see periods when I have felt stuck, burnt out, and even disenchanted in my “real world” existence. When I was a teen and into my early 20’s I made a lot of bad choices trying to get unstuck. Some choices left me feeling the same negative emotions, some choices left me feeling painless only temporarily, and some choices seemed to dig a bigger hole. At times I struggled for answers, felt desperate for change, and longed for something different even if I could not define what that something was at the time. Don’t get me wrong; in my 30’s and now 40’s, there have been some wrong turns and less than ideal decisions at times, but they are no longer choices or decisions that are destructive, baffling or fruitless. I no longer stay stuck. When I stumble I have the skills and strategies to bounce back from stressful moments and regain life balance. It takes less time to “right my ship”. I show up for my life and feel good about my decisions, relationships and life direction. That’s what we all want, right?
Counseling gets you unstuck.
Sometimes when I talk to clients about how to get unstuck; I see the look in their eyes of feeling let-down. There is not this thing we need to do once and be done with feeling stuck. There is no magic pill or wand that can take away every bit of pain, panic, stress, hurt, confusion, anxiety, sadness and disappointment.
But counseling really helps. It is a little bit of work, but it is not a path you have to go alone. Through the process of counseling you can get unstuck.
Counseling is time just for you to:
- Sort out your stressors, life situations, complicated relationships, destructive thoughts or habits.
- Identify your needs that are not being met.
- Clarify which path to take to achieve your goals.
- Build on your strengths.
- Create a plan for caring for yourself, especially in times of stress.
- Practice new ways in expressing yourself so you can be heard.
- Make decisions that support your true self.
Showing up for yourself…talking about your stressors and concerns…working on solutions to your roadblocks will help to move you forward in your life…counseling gets you unstuck.
For more information about working with Mary at River’s Journey Counseling and getting unstuck, click here.